bittersweet

The more I live (and I'm only 22 years in, mind you) the more I realize that life is so bittersweet. I can't think of any other way to describe it. I feel so much "sweetness" in being here: in the little things that make up for the stress of teaching (like when I come in from recess and my kids are hiding behind a cabinet, jump out and say "SURPRISE!" and then proceed to create a group hug so big I almost fall over - and this twice in a day!) and in the big things that remind me God is encompassing it all (like going to bed at night feeling like I breathed life and joy into kids' lives and waking up the next day with purpose). 
But then there's the bittersweet - like getting to Skype with my sister while I'm getting ready in the morning and cracking up while she yells over my hair dryer, but knowing that I can't hug her or see the laugh lines in her smile.  And there's my brother walking around his house with the laptop so I can peek in on the kids while they are sleeping, but knowing I can't play with them or hold them.  And there's the adorable sweet girl in my class who is the smartest and kindest first grader I have ever seen, and hearing her say "thank you" even if I just handed her a piece of blank paper - but who has a serious stomach problem and has missed most of school - watching the glow come back into her face and then leave again - walking her to the office because she just can't make it through the day.
There's alot I don't understand in life, but I think all we can really do is be that "city on a hill," shine the light and love of God, pour it into people's lives. What greater good could we do?