There are two ways of standardized testing. The first is criteria-referenced, where you fall into a category based on a set standard. The second is norm-referenced, where you fall into a place compared to whatever the norm, or majority, is.
So here's my scores. On a criteria-referenced scale, compared to most of the world, I am rich. My life has been easy. I have been protected from harm. I have lacked nothing I ever needed. I have always had a place to go, a shoulder to lean on, and extra money sitting around. But is that really the norm? I recently had lunch with 15 people, looked around the table, and realized that I and the one other white person there were the only ones who had not been orphaned, abused, or trafficked. My worst fears are their realities. And all I can think is "OH GOD, WHY? How are they sitting there finding reasons to smile and laugh? I couldn't do it. And why do some of us get the best of everything and others get the worst? And I don't even fully appreciate what I have." Gut check.
I spent the past 4 days with a missionary, Suzy, who has lived down here for the past 30 years, and God has done amazing things. I met her through the orphanage she started where us teachers sometimes go to spend time with the kids. She let me step into her world for a few days. She lives a little out of the city with her 5 kids she has adopted, an elderly woman they are taking care of, and a 10 month old they are now raising. On the property is also a small house where a young mom and her 3 year old daughter live and help with the house. I played with the little girl alot, and her laugh was quite possibly the most contagious and high-pitched one I have ever heard. Stepping into their home helped me to see how normal it can be to "care for orphans and widows in their distress" and how we are all people and the same at the core. Suzy and I went various places together, and those car rides brought up some good, challenging conversations that I am still processing through. We went to a school she started in a bad neighborhood, and I had the opportunity to see two graduation services - one for kindergarten and one for sixth grade. The kids who at the school either live in the neighborhood or live at the orphanage. That school was like a beam of hope shining in a dark place. It was so awesome to see the kids at the orphange getting awards and pins for academic honors. One little boy from the orphanage even recognized me and sat on my lap for a little bit.
This morning Suzy got a call from a girl my age who wanted a ride. She was downtown on the streets. She has lived that way off and on since she was seven. So we jumped in the car pretty fast and took off, as Suzy just said, "Sorry but I'm taking you somewhere dangerous again." I thought of something my friend told me: "There is danger everywhere you go, but there is God everywhere you go too." So, instead of going to watch some boys at the orphanage play soccer (original plan), here we were, on a trek to find this girl. And it took us a long time. We finally stopped at a park and walked toward a hotel where she was supposed to be, but she wasn't there. We were sort of at the dead-end of a street, and then we saw this group of guys walking our way and shouting. As we kept walking Suzy translated for me: "Pick me! I am the king of the streets." We walked around a park and looked down the streets until one of the guys came up to us again, but this time he was telling us where the girl was. She was laying at the end of the street with her face in the ground. The guy gestured something about her throat. So I just braced myself for the worst and we walked straight into that group of guys who were surrounding her. She was barely alive. The guys helped us get her into the car. We ended up taking her up to a hospital where we spent most of the afternoon, and then we took her to a psychiatric hospital. It was the probably the most eye-opening experience of my life. I found out that she had tried to hang herself. I also found out that she was the mother of the same little boy I was holding in my lap at his kindergarten graduation. And she loves that little boy. And she wants better for him. And she is trying to be better for him.
One of the things Suzy and I talked about was how we make judgments on people, on the poor in particular. We judge them for not being able to take care of their own kids or for leaving them. We look down on them for doing drugs or prostituting themselves. But it's just not that easy. As I met all these people this weekend, I (with my overactive imagination) saw these little filmstrips rolling above their heads showing clips of their lives and all their experiences up to this point. Just think - if that is all you ever knew, what else would you do?
We all need redemption. And God is teaching me right now what I need to change in my life and what my focus needs to be. He keeps opening my eyes to this world, and I can't pretend I don't see.
I heard this song 3 times on the radio while I was at Suzy's.
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